Balakumar K

Madurakaran Jigaruthandam!

Rosogolla has, literally literally, become very difficult on the mouth. We mean it is no longer rosogolla but officially ‘Banglar Rasogolla’. It’s all because of the GI tag that has been conferred on it. Some of you may wonder why this new name for rosogalla, what is this GI tag, why is there a government department to handle such stuff and, most importantly, did they submit rosogollas in triplicate to

When official scorer slipped into coma

◊ India-Sri Lanka encounters have the record for the most bizarre records Chennai, Nov 16: The India – Sri Lanka cricket series… oh no! don’t sleep now itself. An India-Sri Lanka cricket series is supposed to have begun somewhere today, or at least that is what we are told. For all we know, it might be an ongoing series between the two teams that people are noticing only now. There

When confusing Kamal was left confused

After Kamal Haasan announced his political plans on his birthday earlier this week, you’d have thought that we in media would be debating whether someone, who so far has been solely focused on his film career, can make the cut in politics. Ha. Ha. Ha. Allow us to laugh in your face. We in the media have no longer the time for such reasonable stuff. Before the ink on the

When PM made common people talk about economics

The announcement of Prime Minister on the night of November 8 and the subsequent steps that the Finance Ministry and the RBI took were verily a war on that part of economy that deals with black humour. We at Crank’s News should know. Try as much as we did, despite our experience as long-standing silly clowns in the industry, we have not been able to match the efforts of the


In the last two years, Chennai has become the undisputed world leader in slipping into panic mode in a jiffy. The moment the clouds so much as turn black, Chennai people, thanks to the experience of 2015 floods, become stiff with tension, and people elsewhere, thanks to the seamless connectivity that modern-day technology provides, pick up the ball and add to the tumult, as all manner of conjectures and fears are passed

A currency system so advanced that it's not currency

All questions you did not want to ask on Bitcoin answered Chennai, Nov 2: You’d have doubtless heard about Bitcoin. At any rate, you just did. Well, it is a virtual currency that has stirred a lot of controversy, and it is also pretty confusing, which sounds like a lot like demonetisation but believe us, it is not all that pointless. Here at Crank’s News we have a great tradition

Double trouble!

Reporting on the recent controversy over Mersal movie, one news site mixed up Vijay and Vijay Sethupathi. This was equivalent to mistaking Amit Shah for Bernard Shaw. To be fair, it was a North Indian news site (omnibus editorial policy: “How the hell do you expect us to know anything about South India or Srl Lanka or whatever they call their place?”). So we should at least be happy that they made Vijay Vijay Sethupathi and

83% feel GST rules confusing, and they are just the I-T staff

*State of the nation poll reveals state of the nation Chennai, Oct 25: ‘The State of the Nation’ poll is a big tradition in media, an occasion when we reveal to the public what they revealed to us in the first place. Don’t you think we in the media are fabulous? As with all other polls and surveys in the media, this one too has a great tradition for being

Festival on crack

It’s festival time. With the bustle and sparkle of the moment, it may be easy to forget the real tradition of the occasion. We will remind you: It’s about purchasing electronic consumer devices that you mostly have no need for. It is a practice that goes back to Lord Krishna’s time, as we can see in this verbatim exchange between Him and Yashodha: Yashodha: I will tie You to the

Raiders of the last arc

ISuggestThatYouTryReadingThistAloudWithoutAnyPauseAndWithoutLettingYourIntensityDownEvenForASecondAndWhileAtItYouCanAlsoTryTwistingTurningTwirlingKickingAndRunningAroundBecauseItWillGiveYouAGoodIdeaOfWhatItTakesToBeA… Tcha! I lost my breath there. I guess you too would have, unless otherwise you happen to be Ajay Thakur. But if you are Ajay Thakur, you can probably read this entire column in a single breath. Ajay Thakur is capable of this because he has no lungs. Okay, that is an obvious lie. Ajay Thakur is capable of this because he is the star raider for the Chennai

Tamannah’s cleavage & other festival attractions

* A look at how new ads reach out to people by being totally stupid Chennai, Oct 4: Thanks to the recent India-Australia one-day series, we at Crank’s News watched a lot of cricket. Sorry, correction: We apologise for the incorrect previous sentence. What we did was, we attempted to watch cricket, but what we did was: followed a lot of advertisements. And by boy, some of the advertisements were